Tama Phelps has cared for her daughter with spina bifida for almost 40 years.Tama PhelpsTama Phelps, 64, cares for her disabled daughter, affecting her financially and emotionally.Phelps also manages her father's care while facing personal marital challenges.Her daughter's care costs are high, and family pressures weigh on Phelps' mental health.This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Tama Phelps, 64, who lives in Ann Arbor, Michiga…