FAA Solves ‘No One Talks in the Cockpit’ Problem by Banning Talking: “All Good Now,” Says Agency

FAA Solves ‘No One Talks in the Cockpit’ Problem by Banning Talking: “All Good Now,” Says Agency

After comedian-pilot Nathan Fielder publicly branded the FAA’s blasé attitude toward cockpit-communication lapses as “dumb,” the agency didn’t just clear its throat—it cleared out speech altogether. Enter the bold new Quiet Skies doctrine: total, policy-mandated silence at 38 000 ft. The logic is elegantly circular—if nobody speaks, nobody can say the wrong thing. (Bonus: no more “Uh, folks, we hit a bit of turbulence.”) Industry insiders say th…