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Dear Abby: Daughter levels with mother about her future plans
Daughter declines caregiving to enjoy retirement, forcing parents to consider using their inheritance assets for assisted living after six years of family care.
- A 67‑year‑old parent in Missouri revises estate plans after their daughter declines caregiving, risking assets covering assisted-living costs instead of inheritance.
- For the past six years, the couple has cared for aging parents, supporting their 87‑year‑old mother‑in‑law who lives alone, while a deceased father‑in‑law with Alzheimer’s shaped their experience.
- Facing competing family obligations — their daughter, their only child, said she loves them but plans to enjoy retirement and travel, with expectations complicated by three sets of parents.
- The parents say they feel hurt and asked `How do I navigate this without making things worse?` in their letter, describing emotional strain over their only child’s refusal.
- Abigail Van Buren, Dear Abby columnist, noted this is not an unusual situation and urged planning now, warning parents who expect children to provide care risk disappointment.
15 Articles
15 Articles
Dear Abby: My daughter says she won’t take care of us when we’re elderly
DEAR ABBY: I am 67, and my husband is 68. For the past six years, we have been caring for aging parents. My father-in-law, who had Alzheimer’s, passed away a few years ago. We went through a lot with him as his illness progressed. My mother-in-law is 87 and does not want to go into a nursing home. She still lives by herself, but my sister-in-law and I take turns cooking and bringing her food, and my husband works his tail off cutting the grass a…
Dear Abby: Is it normal for kids these days to refuse to help aging parents?
DEAR ABBY: I am 67, and my husband is 68. For the past six years, we have been caring for aging parents. My father-in-law, who had Alzheimer’s, passed away a few years ago. We went through a lot with him as his illness progressed. My mother-in-law is 87 and does not want to go into a nursing home. She still lives by herself, but my sister-in-law and I take turns cooking and bringing her food, and my husband works his tail off cutting the grass a…
Michigan Live
Dear Abby: Daughter levels with mother about her future plans
When she retires, she wants to enjoy her retirement, travel and not have to worry about caring for anybody.
Dear Abby: Daughter won’t care for aging parents
Dear Abby: I am 67, and my husband is 68. For the past six years, we have been caring for aging parents. My father-in-law, who had Alzheimer’s, passed away a few years ago. We went through a lot with him as his illness progressed. My mother-in-law is 87 and does not want to go into a nursing home. She still lives by herself, but my sister-in-law and I take turns cooking and bringing her food, and my husband works his tail off cutting the grass a…
The Berkshire Eagle
Daughter levels with mother about her future plans
DEAR ABBY: I am 67, and my husband is 68. For the past six years, we have been caring for aging parents. My father-in-law, who had Alzheimer's, passed away a few years ago. We went through a lot with him…
Abby: Daughter levels with mother about her future plans
DEAR ABBY: I am 67, and my husband is 68. For the past six years, we have been caring for aging parents. My father-in-law, who had Alzheimer’s, passed away a few years ago. We went through a lot with him…
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- 46% of the sources lean Left, 46% of the sources are Center
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